Clay
Originally Published on Bring The Rain
This has been a hard week.
Just six words, but they pretty much sum it up.
After crying through basically every human interaction I have had for the last several days, I realized that there was something in me that needed to be broken. Something that I hadn't felt completely yet. Todd left to go on the road on Wednesday night, and I sobbed like a baby. Shaking, gasping, "why can't you be an accountant and work 9-5?" tears. I was not ready to be alone with my thoughts yet. I wasn't ready to be in charge of the kids, of the house, of anything that did not involve Kleenex. As he left the house around 11:30 p.m., I curled up in my bed and I invited the sorrow in. She came swiftly, deeply, consumingly. And she whispered to me in the dark of night.
I am here to stay.
We had a rainstorm yesterday (go figure), and I made up my mind that I needed to be with my daughter for awhile. As soon as it started to let up, I called my dad and he came to watch the kids so that I could go to the cemetery. I have wanted to go to her many times before, but I haven't had the strength to be weak.
This has been a hard week.
Just six words, but they pretty much sum it up.
After crying through basically every human interaction I have had for the last several days, I realized that there was something in me that needed to be broken. Something that I hadn't felt completely yet. Todd left to go on the road on Wednesday night, and I sobbed like a baby. Shaking, gasping, "why can't you be an accountant and work 9-5?" tears. I was not ready to be alone with my thoughts yet. I wasn't ready to be in charge of the kids, of the house, of anything that did not involve Kleenex. As he left the house around 11:30 p.m., I curled up in my bed and I invited the sorrow in. She came swiftly, deeply, consumingly. And she whispered to me in the dark of night.
I am here to stay.
We had a rainstorm yesterday (go figure), and I made up my mind that I needed to be with my daughter for awhile. As soon as it started to let up, I called my dad and he came to watch the kids so that I could go to the cemetery. I have wanted to go to her many times before, but I haven't had the strength to be weak.
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